There is approximately 60 years of research on campus sexual assault and shelves full of books on young people’s sexual experiences and behaviors, including their experiences with assault.

More is likely to be generated following the September 2026 high-profile lawsuit by a female former Cornell University student, known as Jane Doe, who says that a group of seven Chi Phi fraternity members drugged and gang-raped her when she was a sophomore in 2024.

Yet, there is very little research about the role parents have played, or should play, in educating their children about campus sexual assault prevention.

I am a sociologist who spent 2024 and 2025 interviewing 56 parents across the country about this very issue. Collectively, they sent 74 children off to college between 2017 and 2024.

Most parents of college-bound young people know there is a sexual assault problem on campus, but they do not see it as a problem that is likely to affect their child or children, my research shows.

Relying too much on rape myths

The problem of campus sexual assault is well documented. Almost 1 in 4 undergraduate women, 1 in 20 undergraduate men, and nearly 1 in 4 transgender and gender-diverse young people report experiencing sexual assault while in college.

Almost 11% of undergraduate men have committed sexual assault, according to one estimate. Almost 80% of campus sexual assaults go unreported.

This disconnect can be explained by the fact that most of the parents I spoke to unconsciously rely on rape myths to understand campus sexual assault. Rape myths refer to widely held and inaccurate beliefs about rape, rapists and rape victims that serve to deny, justify or downplay sexual assault.

Most parents of sons I spoke with, for instance, said that their son is not the kind of person who would jump out from behind a bush wielding a weapon and attack a young woman walking alone at night.

They are probably right.

Campus sexual assault is rarely perpetrated by an armed stranger. More often, it is committed by someone who knows the victim. In most campus sexual assaults, as well, the victim and the perpetrator know one another, a pattern known as date rape or acquaintance rape.

Fear of false accusations

While most parents are convinced that their son will never assault someone, and they rarely consider that he could be the victim of a sexual assault, my research finds that in the face of the widespread problem of campus sexual assault, parents of sons are overwhelmingly concerned that their son might be falsely accused.

Out of the 38 parents of sons in my sample, 58% expressed concern that their son risked being falsely accused of sexual assault. This aligns with the myth that women lie about being assaulted for revenge or attention, among other reasons.

Approximately 5% to 10% of reported sexual assaults are false accusations, according to research.

One mother, who has two sons and one daughter, described “a fear that your son will be falsely accused.”

“That should not be my biggest priority, but it is in my head, knowing my kid,” she said.

Not thinking their daughters might be at risk

Perhaps more surprisingly, my research found that many parents of daughters did not view them as being at risk of sexual violence, even when they understood the extent of the problem of campus sexual assault.

Many parents of daughters responded to questions about whether they educated their child or children about sexual assault prevention by stating, “I didn’t have to worry about that.”

Some explained that their daughter’s specific personality traits protected her from being victimized – especially if she was strong, outspoken, level-headed or had “street smarts.”

If their daughter was religious, did not drink alcohol or use drugs before going to college, or was queer, parents felt she was not at risk of being assaulted.

I spoke with one mother with a son and a daughter in college. She said she was not worried about her daughter being sexually assaulted because her daughter “will for sure fight to take care of herself. … She’s always been very strong like that.”

Another mother with one daughter in college said she was not worried because her daughter doesn’t drink or want to have sex before marriage. “I feel comfortable. She is not getting into situations that could lead to something,” she said.

Such thinking aligns with the false belief that women are responsible for their own sexual victimization, especially if they drink or use recreational drugs.

Talking to kids about sexual assault

For many parents, conversations with their children about sexuality-related topics are difficult. These conversations require that parents see their child as a sexual being or a soon-to-be sexually active person, which is, admittedly, not easy for a lot of parents.

But this kind of conversation can help protect them from possible harm.

First, parents could educate themselves about the reality of campus sexual assault.

Parents I spoke to often used their own collegiate experiences to understand campus sexual assault. I heard people saying that if they did not know anyone who was sexually assaulted in college, it must not have been a problem on their campus.

The next step is to take one’s knowledge about campus sexual assault and share it, over time, in ongoing conversations with their child or children.

These sorts of conversations should go beyond phrases like “no means no” and include discussions about affirmative consent, clear communication, reading body language and power dynamics.

Consent education is just the beginning.

I have found that many parents believe that the values they taught their child, or children, would magically translate into their child or children never perpetrating sexual violence.

Not an easy talk, but a necessary one

I thought one of the most alarming aspects of the Cornell gang-rape case was that one of the fraternity brothers sent a message to a Chi Phi group chat, announcing that Jane Doe was sexually available to anyone who was interested. None of the 50 fraternity brothers who saw this message stepped in to stop the alleged gang rape or help Jane Doe get out of harm’s way.

My research shows that parents expressed fears surrounding the influence of technology on young people but mostly worried about sexting and revenge porn, particularly when their children were younger.

Speaking with teenagers and young adults about sexual assault is not easy. However, when considering the parents of the Cornell seven and the unnamed victim, there are far more uncomfortable positions for a parent to be in.

Kathleen J Fitzgerald does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organization that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.